It’s Valentine’s Day (just in case you were in your own little world and didn’t realize that) and it’s interesting watching those around me, pondering my past and present, and taking it all in for what it is. I’m not sure if I’m in the minority or what, but I certainly find it an interesting time. I’m not a cynical bastard, I’m not the super-sappy romantic, I’m more of a mix of it all. With a dash of realist in there too.
I emailed a friend a couple days ago and suggested we go out tonight and get some drinks, share stories from our past relationsips and watch people spend far too much on dinner with their dates. She of course got a chuckle out of it and thought it was a good idea (but she had plans so we’re not doing it) and also finds humor in how the masses will spend double or triple what they normally would for a nice dinner.
I’m spending this Valentine’s Day alone again. I’m not bitter, depressed, happy, sad, or any variation thereof. I’ve said to a couple people “I’m spending this one alone” but again, it’s not in a “woe is me” way. Rather, I’m just stating a fact, sort of like “damn it was cold last night” or “toomorrow is Friday”. So what is floating in my head that has me feeling this way? Well…let’s see…
First off, I’d much rather be alone (notice I say “alone” and not “lonely”) and happy with life than in a miserable relationship but be able to say “hey, at least I’m not alone”. A coworker was commenting how she heard people calling into the radio station that they’d rather be in a crappy relationship instead of being alone. Really? People really think like that? Evidently, yes. I guess there were quite a few people calling in after that saying they feel the same way. Wow…that’s sad. Real sad. I REALLY hope they are in the minority and not the majorityhere. So yes, I’m fine with being alone and happy with my life rather than in a crappy relationship just for the sake of being in one.
Does that mean I’d rather be alone in general? Nope. I would absolutely love to have someone to share this time with. someone that I want to show how much I care for them and such. However, this is also where Valentine’s Day itself is rather annoying. Society dictates that we have to do something special today. Chocolates, candy, a fancy dinner, cards, etc. Why? Can’t I do that any day? And for me, it’s really about the small things anyway. When I look back at my better relationships, I felt most special when they left me little notes around or stickers in my car before work, etc. I like to do the same thing for them too…to let them know that I appreciate them, am thinking of them, etc. Yet we’re all made to feel that if we forget to do something “special” (think BIG) for Valentine’s Day, then we don’t care, we forgot, they aren’t special to us, blah blah blah.
So…I think Valentine’s Day is kinda silly. Yes, I’d like to do something special for someone but find it annoying that I “have” to. In some years I’d be depressed that I didn’t have anyone to share it with, other years I haven’t. Some people say “screw Valentine’s Day” and are bitter all day. Others are super sappy mushy. Funny how one day can elicit so many different emotions and actions from people…and society as a whole.
